Max was The Dog for me. If you're lucky in life you get one of those; The Dog. The one who is your everything. Friend/lover/therapist/child/soulmate. The one you get when you're young enough and maybe it's just you and The Dog and you belong to each other and the relationship changes you and shapes who you become and, yeah, there will be other dogs you love but there will never be another like The Dog. The one that was there for all of it. The one you grew up with. It's a once-in-a-lifetime deal. Forever grateful to Serge for writing about our guy because I can't right now.
Serge and I had the privilege of holding our Maxie boy in our arms this morning as he left this life. Sinatra played softly and the morning sun streamed through the window almost illuminating his body as he took his last breath. 11 years. Don't know how to live without him.
"I have been attempting to plug the holes in my personality with other people for my entire life. It’s high time for that to be over. I need to accept myself for who I am and really be OK with that or else decide what I can’t be OK with and work on fixing it. I’ve had a negative monologue about myself running through my head for so long I don’t know what’s real and what isn’t anymore. But I need to stop seeking others to counterpoint the negativity and do it myself. Be my own best friend. Accept myself and fix myself, if I can."