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Tuesday
Mar262013

I Want To Be Pretty! Or At Least Try...

"This photo is so staged! There is no way her family dresses like that every day."

"ANOTHER selfie showcasing her meticulously made up face and perfectly messy hair?"

"How does she even wear those shoes anywhere? They're so impractical."

There I was. Encased in my standard uniform of yoga pants and giant, shapeless T-shirt they were giving away at the county fair circa 2009, inhaling the kids' leftover Valentine's Day candy, judging other moms via their blogs. The very same thing I complain that people do to me. The sassy moms and my perception of their lifestyles even prompted me to make what I now view as a somewhat sanctimonious video wherein I (proudly?) proclaim how ugly I look and messy my bedroom is, basically explaining how I "keep it real" which, now seems to me, is very effectively keeping it way less real than the pretty people I was bitching about.

Thing is, I really enjoyed looking at the pretty blogs. I liked seeing beautiful photos of happy families whether staged or not. Yes, yes, I realize there's a fine line between focusing on the positive and sharing those moments as opposed to pretending life is always amazing. But still... When did I decide that looking like shit is keeping it real?

So I thought and thought and thought about why I reacted so strongly about someone showcasing the beauty of life whether through lovely photos of their homes, gorgeous clothes or adorably dressed kids and I realized something:

I'm jealous. Plain and simple.

Jealous that these moms manage to look pretty and stylish even though many of them have more kids than I do. Jealous that they seemingly know how to decorate a room in that way that looks like some HGTV star popped in for tea and decided to quickly renovate the kitchen in the process. Jealous that they manage to dress their children stylishly instead of shoving their kicking legs in whatever sexist Garanimals piece is least dirty.

I want to look pretty too, I realized... And then my whole life/motherhood theory exploded.

Basically I have long held the mistaken belief that some of the qualities of a good mom include bitching about how harassed you feel, exaggerating and joking about how put upon moms are, how tired we are, how little we're sleeping, how showering and getting out of yoga pants is worthy of celebration, how managing to put on a dash of make-up is a victory. You know, because we're moms and that's the hardest job in the world and martyr, martyr, martyr...

All those things are true, showering may very well be a victory and moms are totally put upon, but somewhere along my motherhood journey I decided that ditching fashion and make-up made me more real. I think my Buddhist notions got all tangled up in there as well. The idea of ditching material things and focusing on my inner self, which is all well and good but I totally forgot that looking good on the outside helps me feel better on the inside.

I blame blogging too. When we all started blogging we were understandably thrilled to discover other moms who were also struggling with the myriad of difficulties that come with parenting instead of pretending their kids are better than ours (like the previous generation seemed to do) and so we bonded and celebrated and wrote missives pretty much calling our kids assholes. And we thought it was hilarious and great because kids can be huge assholes and, like popping a zit festering on your chin for days, it was such a relief to get it out!

The more posts we published about the horror that is parenting, the more we admitted that kids can be such assholes the better we felt. As opposed to pre-blogging days when everyone pretended they had it totally together in public and fell apart behind closed doors, it was such a relief to realize that you weren't the only parent who didn't know how to parent, that, in fact, nobody knows how to parent, that we're all just making it up as we go.

But we went too far, I think. We're still going too far. We continue to showcase the assholery of our children with barely restrained glee. We joke about how we wear our pajamas all day as if it's some kind of badge of honor, we reveal intimate details about our bodies that, quite frankly, I'm tired of reading about. Don't get me wrong, I'm verrrry guilty of this and I do enjoy a good post-birth mangled vagina joke as much as the next gal. Plus it can be therapeutic to realize you aren't the only one dealing with an unrelenting case of nipple hair but, as I'm learning, a little mystery never hurt anyone either. Additionally, a focus on the positive side of parenting, showcasing the beauty, can be as helpful to yourself and others as reveling in the negative in some mistaken notion that you are "keeping it real."

I stopped wearing make-up, stopped shopping for new clothes, pretty much ignored fashion and ultimately looked like shit. For years now I've looked terrible 95% of the time. And while I did it I told myself I was a better person for not concerning myself with the superficial, wasn't wasting money on pricey clothing, cosmetics and shoes and was even teaching my daughter what is truly important in life. In the process I turned into a ghost of my former self. Especially now that I work from home. No make-up, hair always slicked into a shapeless ponytail, gray or black yoga pants, t-shirts and gym shoes whether I managed to make it to the gym or not.

But looking like shit wasn't my only crime. I actually felt a kind of superiority towards women who concern themselves with such things because they seemed frivolous, materialistic and silly. As if looking nice is somehow done at the cost of being a good parent when, in actuality, looking good helps you feel good and may lead to better parenting. Although, when I made the aforementioned video I was coming from a good place, trying to say that it's really hard to be a mom and get shit done and still look good so it's okay if you don't look smashing all the time.

But what I neglected to reveal, what I wasn't aware of until after making the video, was how shitty "keeping it real" makes me feel about myself. What I've learned in the past month of dressing up and wearing make-up - if only a dash of bright lipstick - is that there is nothing frivolous or materialistic or silly about self-confidence and feeling good. It's a fact: feeling good on the outside helps us feel good on the inside. No matter how much the feminist inside my head doesn't want to believe it, the old saying about how lipstick can make you feel better is true. To a degree. It's not going to make your kids behave or give you more hours of sleep at night but taking twenty seconds to slather on a quick coat can make a huge difference in your mood.

So now, instead of ignoring how I look and pretending like not caring about my appearance means I'm somehow keeping it more real than the mom who attempts to look good, I'm making an effort. I'm trying to look hot. Serge certainly hasn't minded. And the look on my daughter's face the first time I emerged with make-up for a date night with dad told me everything I need to know. She did a double-take then stared at me in wonder before saying, "Mommy! You look bee-yoo-tee-full!"

Instead of instinctively launching into my routine about how make up is for fun but ladies don't really need it I simply said, "Thank you! I feel beautiful too!"


Now that I'm wearing make-up on a daily basis I guess I should probably pay someone and get my hair did. Because yeesh.

I am so interested in hearing your thoughts. Where do you fall on the spectrum of caring about style and fashion or even just putting on make-up and nice clothes even though you may not have anywhere to be?

*Note: I've got a new post up on MamaPop about House Hunters and why it's the greatest reality show on television. And if you haven't left a comment to win this beautiful Love Bird art your chances are pretty good. There are only thirty-something comments as of now!

Reader Comments (37)

I really enjoyed this post! I like that you have strong opinions, but are not afraid to change them when you realise that you may not have been necessarily correct the first time! Give you hair 3 minutes with a hair iron, and your life will be entirely transformed!

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterK

I could have written this post (if I had your eloquence). Just yesterday I booked a hair appointment for myself because when I caught my reflection in the review mirror (that's right, I somehow hadn't seen a mirror all morning!), I realized "not needing" makeup or a hairstyle (let alone a shower), simply isn't true anymore. I look like Sh*t and I feel like it too. And if I'm really honest, the reason I've been such a "pious" feminist about not "needing" to spend my money and time on my looks is that when I was younger and childless, I did look pretty damn good without those things. But now, I need help. And I shouldn't feel guilty about making myself look and feel good. So thanks for writing this!

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLeora

@Leora - Yes. Thank you for that comment. Exactly!

March 26, 2013 | Registered CommenterThe Girl Who...

I hear you. Once my youngest hit 5 I started to think about trying to look good again... at least sometimes. I think that I was in a bit of a fog when they were little. I still wear yoga pants happily on most days but sometimes I want to look pretty and I make an effort. BTW- you look gorgeous.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBetsy

I'm not a mom, but I've come to a similar conclusion as of late - I feel better when I dress up a little or put a little tinted lip gloss on. And when I feel better, I don't act so depressed and am more fun (I think) to be around. Thanks for this timely post.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKat

@Kat - I noticed this too. When I wear fun clothes and put on make-up my personality brightens as well.

March 26, 2013 | Registered CommenterThe Girl Who...

I'm 30-40 pounds overweight so the only way I feel pretty is when I do my make-up and hair, and accessorize. It's like magic and makes me very happy. Nail polish is magical too, especially when I spend a lot of time typing on the computer :-)

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGrace Miler

I'm not a parent but I do nanny and care for my niece on a daily basis. I used to have the same opinion, "I'm better than you because I didn't take precious moments away from the children to do my makeup and fix up my hair" eff that! Anytime I walked out the door I felt like complete crap in my yoga pants and XXL Bank of America sweatshirt with holes and stains. I took laziness to a whole new level and my self confidence and marriage took the hit.

I think it is VITAL as a woman to do what's right for you, if you feel damn awesome strutting cake face make up, you do it! If you feel good wearing stretch Lycra and over sized shirts, rock it. At some point I think mothers fail to accept that it's OKAY to think about yourself!, your kids don't have to be priority all the time! You have to take care of yourself in order to properly take care of your family.

That's a lot of exclamation points but I'm serious, feel good abut your self and your kids will see it and love and respect you for it.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMrsLeyk

I fell into that trap when I had my second. I decided I need to shower and dress nicely for me. Now I only wear yoga pants around the house (and maybe the park up the street). If I'm going out that day (which is most days) I have to wear my nicer outside clothes. Which means buying comfortable slouchy clothes that I think look good! (Still cheap though. My long sleeve T's were all $4-7 at JCP)

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Amen, sister. I'm still carrying extra weight (now it's toddler weight, not baby weight) and I still feel awful about myself. But when I put just about 2 minutes more effort into getting dressed, I magically feel better. Today, for example - I am so beyond pissed at my husband, I've been up since 4, really, I should be in a crap mood. But I'm wearing cute clothes, my hair looks good, and I'm astoundingly chipper. That could just be the tater tots speaking, though...

Thank you for this, this validation that it's ok to act on vanity.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoie

I made a pact with myself when I was pregnant with my first that I was still going to keep up with myself. Granted, I've not lost the baby weight and am pregnant again (how conveeeeeenient!) But every day on maternity leave, I showered, dressed, did my hair and makeup. I do my nails regularly. I'm still working outside the home, in Manhattan, with a bunch of single nyc girls, and really felt like I needed to at least sort of keep up. So, I credit that with giving me the motivation to not fall into what I call the "nonchalant mom" look.

I do an upgraded version of yoga pants and tee: the black legging and tunic sweater. I do my hair. I wear full makeup every day and as my kid splashes me right in the face at bathtime, I know my day of beauty is ending, haha.

Also, I take advantage of crazy sales and promotions where you get free sample/sample jumbo sizes of makeup for a small purchase (Sephora and macy*s are good ones; macy*s is having a clinique one this week that rocks) so that I don't have to buy makeup that much. I haven't bought mascara in a year.

So yay for you!

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterchristine

This is an interesting admission. It is fascinating, this way that women are looking at each other on the internet. What is all of this new visual and textual information giving us? Making us feel more authentic? More connected? I think that we are all doing important identity work when we check into these portals, but an element of self-reflection is also necessary. As an entrenched feminist, I do not think it is necessary to step away from the tools that women have used in the past (beauty, allure, mystery) just because we feel we don't "need" them anymore. The legacy that is left to us from the generations of women before us should not be squandered now, seeing us negate ourselves and our value just because we desire beauty. I think on some basic level, we desire not just the beauty, but the order that self-care allows us to feel in our lives.
As the years march on, I find myself less caught up in the consumerism aspect of beauty and fashion and more comfortable clearly understanding the difference between pangs of desire and want and the siren call of an authentic thing that really belongs in my life (or on my face or body). We all have our particular tastes that blow our skirts up and part of mothering is to let your children see you figuring these things out and relishing what draws our particular interests.
I still remember my mother's lipstick, the mirrored compact in her stylish purse, her awesome 60s/70s/80s hairstyles (wigs too!), all her botched and successful hair dye/perm attempts and the way she kept her jewelry drawer just so. I was always watching, and she taught me so much about what being a strong woman should look like. In every single little thing I do for myself, in the mirror and otherwise, I hope to do the same for my sons.
Here's to you on the journey, Monica! We are all traveling the same road. Why shouldn't we get a few "Mommy! You look bee-yoo-tee-full!"s along the way?

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkatherine

@katherine - I wish my site allowed me to "thumbs up" comments. Yours is such a beautiful, thoughtful one.

March 26, 2013 | Registered CommenterThe Girl Who...

You might have noticed from my FB posts lately that I'm just starting to dabble in the world of makeup and skin care (or might not have - I'm not that important!) Haha. But anyway, I've really loved it! I've started to learn about makeup and techniques and the first time I pulled off a really pretty look, I FELT GOOD. ALL DAY. As someone who has struggled to even get out of bed for months, this meant the world to me, so I'm not going to knock it. I felt pretty, for the first time in months, which meant I wanted to leave the house. That's no small feat! Our mental well-being is so precious. I say whatever it takes to feel good, DO IT!! You go, beautiful lady! I'm right there with you.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha

Great post, Monica. Everything you said in this post is right in line with what Stacy London and Clinton Kelly have been saying on What Not to Wear for 10 years. It may have started out as just a makeover show. But it quickly became clear how much the whole experience -- real shopping for a proper wardrobe ($5,000 worth as part of the show), a real cut (and usually color) from a true expert in the hair field, and a thorough lesson in make-up application and what works for a particular woman and why -- transformed these women. Looking beautiful and feeling beautiful on the outside really does affect how we all feel on the inside. Of course it's what's on the inside that matters more, but paying attention to what's on the outside really can nurture what's on the inside and help give a woman a nudge in the right direction to continue the ongoing, positive transformation process on her own.

You look fabulous!

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKristin

Hey Monica,
I love this post!!
For myself I have to get up everyday , shower, put on a little make up to make me feel good and ready to go out the door. I spend maybe 30 mins top on my routine. If I don't shower or ect I end up feeling like crap throughout the day. I have 3 kids and sometimes it is a challenge to give myself that time but what a difference it makes. I have many friends who fall into the "mommyhood routine" where they don't get dressed, shower, ect.. I do feel like they put it on everyone else, like they are so better because they don't need make up, ect to feel good about themselves. And if that works for them fine.
I also said as my kids were real little they can sit in a bouncy for 30 mins while I shower and get ready to take on the day.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjennyjen

Nice post, Monica. If nothing else you're truthful. I think it takes a lot of years before we women truly come to terms with who we are and what we what out of life.

The thing I like most about your blog and what keeps me coming back is your honesty. You're not pretentious, and you're damn funny. I read a lot of blogs for a lot of different reasons but you and Sweet Juniper are two of my favorites.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDona

I am SO happy you posted this!

Looking nice isn't even time consuming, It takes just as long to slip on a cotton dress as it does a pair of yoga pants. And red lipstick and mascara takes 2 seconds to apply. i do this even if I am going to the playground with my 2 year old. Yes sometimes I look like total shit too, but for the most part I think it's easy not to.

As far as my normal routine ,I get manicure and eyebrow wax once a week, and I do dress up for work. Sometimes i over dress for work. but I am always overdressed wherever i go. that's just me.

In the mornings I bring my 2 year old in the shower with me, and she plays while i get ready-I blow dry my hair and her hair and she thinks it is great fun. she likes to pretend to put on make up. Maybe some women think this is teaching her the "wrong" thing, but when did make up become so evil?

I know there are women out there who wear their stretch marks and throw up shirts on their hearts with pride.I think it is amazing. however, I am not one of them and I probably will never be. I have always thought that was okay. I am a nice person, I love my daughter...she loves cars and trucks, and princesses and dolls, and I think I am a good mom even though I still wear high heels.

It almost seems like the women who are so caught up in "not caring" actually care MORE than a girl (like me) who dresses up every day because that is who she is. Ya know?

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterteresa

I love this post! I also work from home as a writer. I don't own sweat pants, but I wear the same pair of jeans every day and rotate shirts about twice a week, while my business-casual clothes from my former job collect dust in my closet. I rarely wear makeup and when I do, my family notices. One evening I got ready to go out (with full makeup) and my two-year-old asked, "Mommy, WHAT'S ON YOUR FACE?"

I think it's just easier to not care when you work at home/stay at home. There's no one to impress. But there's no question looking good makes you feel good. I definitely plan on expanding my work-at-home wardrobe this spring/summer. And maybe I'll even put on lipstick.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBetts

You are, now stop you NB you.. But I know how you feel. It's nice that you can be pretty with or without any help! Okay....I keep everything simple. Neat Clean as possible but sometimes let it all go, like now. I am not about fashion but I love when I LIKE when I am wearing, and a nice light perfume..nothing gross. When I see a reflection and it looks better than usual.Actually, I need my brows done asap. They are scary hairy. A little pencil and concealer will do until i get em done. As for routine: I try to get my roots done when they are about 1/2 inch. Brows as needed. Walk as much as possible ( against my will sometimes), Shave legs/pits. Dental Hygeine. Hot washcloth and some kind of face stuff. Ears. No creamy makeup...just concealer. blush, lipstick. eyeliner and rarely mascara. I thought of you today, Random thought...having to do with an eyelash curler. I thought maybe I would go get one again. I think looking pretty can be with or without make up but when you feel that you don't look pretty...is a good time to do a little something to feel better...so when you look in the mirror you can smile and feel pretty. Oh so pretty...fade to song...

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commentergina

I quit my 8-5 a while back to work on my own startup. I live in Texas and I remember being so proud that for 3 months, I never wore long pants. Only shorts. "This is the life!" I thought to myself. Fast forward to winter and I caught a glance of myself in the reflection at the grocery store in my yoga pants and sweat shirt that was 9 sizes too big. I'm used to hating the arm chub or back/side muffin. But with none of my fat in sight I was still horrified. I used to think it was about what I "had" to do. Business casual at work, heels and tight jeans for nights out. And I rebelled like like a freshman in college. Damn the man! I have no boss! I WEAR WHAT I WANT! But that day at the grocery store I decided I'm doing it for me. It wasn't a dirty look from a fashionista or a raised eyebrow from my boss (what? Toms are totes business casual). It was that I was not allowing myself the pride that you feel when you take the time. Because I could have caught a glimpse of that octopus pendant that I love. Or a nice bang swoop. But there was no pride there. It's like here's the shittiest version of me, world. Here's what I have to offer! Zero effort. So I've been trying a little more since then.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlaneyboggs

I absolutely agree with you. I tried and still trying to put on a little make up everyday. But first I still want to maintain my eyebrows and never let it grow into a bush!!.. I always have "no time" to maintain my eyebrows... maybe if i can maintain that then I can wear make up on daily basis... :) When I was in college I never let a single brow grow out of "line". Motherhood is tough and it's true that you get lost to it and forget about yourself. But a little time for yourself will never hurt.. so I say...

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterimadylle

@imadylle - Eyebrow maintenance - hair maintenance in general - is the bane of my existence, it truly is.

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTheGirlWho

oh yes! hair maintenance in general .... :)

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterimadylle

Great post! Brings me back to when my daughter was a baby whenever my husband and I left the house we would do checks on our appearance and make jokes about having to "represent". I am very low maintenance - not much of a make-up wearer or clothes shopper - but I make an effort to look nice when I go out in the world. I do have a corporate job so I get dressed up for work, but even for running errands on the weekend, I more often than not make sure my hair is combed, dash of lipstick, mascara and maybe a necklace or earrings, cute t-shirt,cute flip flops - casual, yet not sloppy. Clean clothes (or clothes with no visible stains - lol) that fit well go a long way in making me feel presentable to society!

March 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

Yaaay !! This is the Monica I love. I mean I love you no matter what, but the days when you use to get all gussied up I thought how beautiful you were, I loved it when you had this look (as in the pic above) I'm so glad you figured this whole thing out.

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermama

I'm all over the spectrum from yoga pants to manicures. In phases, I think. And also careful about the "beauty" thing with my 3 yr old girl.

What I loved about this post was your thought process of realizing your criticism of pretty-bloggers was coming from jealousy. (I really liked your "keeping it real" vid too though.) That's pretty awesome, to be able to see your own good intentions AND ulterior motives too...AND where they might overlap...AND to share here. Cool!

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlexandra

What Alexandra said. And I think everything comes and goes in phases, at least for me, and it has been liberating to admit to myself that what I need right at the moment to have some balance can change and constantly does change, that I'm never 'there' and never will be. I fluctuate between concentrating on the kids and my inner peace and my marriage and studies and my looks and my inner peace and books and the gym and my inner peace and eating and my friends and so it goes. It seems that some people find an equilibrium and glide through life being seamingly stable, others will always wobble on the way. But I'd say the wobblers are the ones that experience life more deeply and thoroughly, so I'm fine with being one of them.

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaura K.

I use to dress up and spice up to look good for my man. After a few years of marriage and a baby I began to neglect my physical appearance. My legs got hairy, I stopped waxing my upper lip, I was a fashion dead zone.... You know the whole bit.

About a year ago I looked in the mirror and said "yuck." What the ffff.... happened to my jazz?! It's not like I spend all my time nursing a baby or don't have a few bucks to get some cool shit at the Thrift Shop. I have no excuse for not taking any pride in my appearance!

Thanks to Pinterest, I don't have to spend cash on Vogue or Vanity Fair. I can be a hip mom for free!

But, I realize now that I don't gussy up for any man. No sirrreee! I gussy up because I always liked fashion, i always loved shoes and make-up and all that girly BS. That's just me and the way I express myself! and feeling good about wearing a pair of brand new Bebe's I purchased for $5 at the Thrift Shop.

I think it all depends on personal preference and always making time to take care of yourself, to do what makes you happy.

It's really quite easy to neglect your happiness or deny yourself from little personal treasures when you are a mom. Moms always end up eating their food cold.

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJackie

I so agree with you on this topic. I too went through a period after I had my daughter that I didn't need to pay attention to how I looked because I am doing 'parenthood' work and god damn, I don't have time to look after myself. It wasn't until last summer when I viewed some pics of myself before child and after that I realized that I wasn't doing myself any favors AND I want my daughter to learn to take pride in her appearance and have some fun doing it! I started making time to exercise, wearing some non-yoga wear and putting on make-up even when I am not going to the office and it actually felt good. I am kinda liking it and I think my hubby is too. Great post!

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterstella

I have 2 jobs, they are both as a farm hand. I wear the dirtiest, oldest, smelliest, manliest clothes all the time. My jobs are so physically demanding, then throw in being a single mom and trying to keep the apartment somewhat clean and I am physically exhausted all the time. When I am home I am in sweats or leggins. Usually with my hair in a bun because it still smells like sheep or cows becasue I was just too damn tired to wash my hair. That being said I am a girly-girl at heart and any time I go out of the house (groceries, stopping by an old friends, running to the bank for 5 minutes) I tend to use as an excuse to get pretty. Not like all dressed up fancy, but I think that when I do dress up I dress a little nicer than the general population. Becuase I look like shit the rest of the time.

March 27, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDani

though showering is most definitely a feat and shaving my legs a revelation, getting dressed in the morning def keeps me feeling like myself and not *just* the keeper of two toddlers. by the way, is it not okay to call them assholes anymore, then? ;) hi, by the way, i'm lauren, and a new fan.

March 28, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Hesterman

You're beautiful with your hair and face a mess. Your family is beautiful too! You were beautiful even when you exploded with baby Henry!
But I understand what you're saying, and this was a great post.
In my nearly five years of parenting, I've not once gone without a daily shower. I'm not nearly as meticulous as I used to be about having my hair done and my mascara on, but I always shower and do 'something' with my hair.' I always put on my concealer and my powder so I can feel good about leaving the house with the kids. One thing I do though is...pajama pants ALL the time. If I'm at home, I'm wearing loose pants (I do put on jeans if I leave the house or if someone comes over). I've justified that by saying I need to be in and out of the bathroom quickly....and I need to be crawling all over the floor playing with the kids. Or I need to be moving fast when I'm cleaning up. Can't have my skinny jeans impeding any movement!! But anyway, a little effort in appearance goes a long way in making a mom feel spectacular and ready to take on the day!! I'm always amazed by how much more 'ready' I feel after slapping on a coat of mascara!

March 28, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLeah

As a little girl, the sight of my mom dressed up or putting on make up, would delight and thrill me. Now that I'm a work-at-home (often running shoe and yoga pants clad) mama of four, I've realized that I loved to see her taking care of herself. It made me feel like she was happy. I try to keep my feet in heels and runners. I don't spend a lot on my appearance, because the money is needed in other places, but I do try to show my kids (daughters especially) that I value getting dressed up and spending time with her daddy or with my friends. I think it's a gift that they see me giving this to myself. Great piece, Monica.

March 28, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLouise

Wow. This whole post could have been written by me. Every word is true, and I feel it in my bones.

I have nothing, NOTHING, to add. Long live lipstick!

April 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Seriously? Thank you for this. Every now and then I need to be reminded that it's okay to want to feel good about how I look, despite the fact that all I do is run after three little boys all day long. You gave me a much needed kick in the pants to apply some mascara (or simply brush my hair)!

April 6, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersarah

You do look beautiful in that last picture. :-)

I'm just now getting to the point where i feel it's ok to buy things for myself.... and not feel guilty that I didn't save that $$ for the house or my kids. I'm trying to make a better effort in myself because DAMNIT I deserve to look pretty.

:-)

April 9, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAndee

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