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Monica Bielanko
A chronicle since 2005 of my marriage & move to Brooklyn in my twenties; becoming a mother in my thirties; moving to Pennsylvania and learning to amicably coparent after divorce in my forties while living 3 doors down from my ex-husband in a small country town.
That's What She Said
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Why does he save the baby formula scoop? A new one comes in every canister. Is he collecting them? Does he have a secret plan for the formula scoop? A formula scoop collection? Because that would just be insane.

Then again, this is the same guy who has plastered our fridge with magnets and tells me I'm jealous of his supercool magnet collection. The guy who has a very large Ziploc filled with wine corks and a container of matchbooks from California to Croatia that I'm not allowed to use.

Guess what?

I use them.

A lot.

I steal single matches out of different books so he won't notice someone used a match out of the book labeled "Hal & Mal's Restaurant and Oyster Bar, Jackson, Mississippi." Or perhaps the matchbook from "Aaron Bonding Company" in Athens, Georgia. "Bail Bonds. 24 hours." A commemorative matchbook from a bonding company? Really?

Matches. Stolen. Outta all of 'em! And you can't unlight a match.